Anonymous asked: What decision?
Just a personal choice I had to make a couple of weeks ago.
"Mental illness is like fighting a war where the enemy’s strategy is to convince you that the war isn’t actually happening."-Unknown (via exoticwild)
"what doesn’t kill you
ruins your lungs
dries out all your tears
leaves you lying awake at 4 in the morning
wishing you weren’t alive"
"He was the one
-Noor Shirazie (via aestheticintrovert)
with cold feet;
yet here I am,
enough for the
both of us."
Fuck fuck fuck fuck why did I do this to myself? I am literally destroying myself.
I still wish I would have had her sometimes. Not because it would have fixed us (nothing could have possibly fixed our relationship, it was over a long time ago) but because I feel like I would have finally brought something good into the world. I regret my decision daily. Even though my life would be so much more difficult, I would have at least had the joy of her smiling face. I keep thinking about how lovely she would have been. It hurts too because you will never know the truth because I just wasn’t strong enough to tell you and there is no point in telling you now. I just wish I could go back and stop myself from making that decision but I can’t and now I just have to live with my regret.
I know you got some issues and I know that you just miss him.
"If it makes you less sad
we’ll start talking again.
You can tell me how vile
I already know that i am”
i feel hollow
i tear at my skin
i want to die
i want to die
Today was rough. I feel like I’m coming out of my skin. There is too much pressure in my brain. I’m stuck and I need help.
We used to go everywhere together.
he always knew where he was going.
he would say
and after awhile, I knew he could navigate
the way on his own.
then they would go places together,
“To the city art museum”
“to the nearest baskin robbins”
it was a late one, that night,
when the car lights dimmed and
only quiet music played.
They went to mcdonalds and olive garden,
to every park in town and
to three different parts of the beach.
but tonight something was different.
he didn’t ask for directions
to her house,
“I don’t know where to go”
he always knew where to go.
why doesn’t he know now?
he cried out again, ” She is gone.”
[Where is gone?]
[I am sorry, I do not know where “Gone” is located,
would you like me to redirect you to “Her House”
you have been there sixty two times in the last two months.]
[Would you like to rename this location “Home”?]
"I dont know where home is anymore"
[Would you like to rename “Her House” to “Home”?]
[“Home” has been saved.]
[Would you like to go “Home”?]